This is called the ';madonna'; complex, when a man doesn't have sexual feeligs to his wife after birth. To men, the mother of his children should be ';pristine'; and respected, just like his own mother, therefore killing his libido. This is even worse if he witnessed the birth of the child.
If you are breastfeeding, that could be a turn off to him. I can't explain why, but this is how some men think. Also, weight gain and stretch marks etc. are a big turn off to men because they are just not used to them. Men may feel overwhelmed by the resposability and have to learn to adjust to the new lifestyle.
Luckily, this is just temporary. Give him some time and make sure that you hire a babysitter. Having the baby always there may be making him feel guilty about it.
Good luckSex advice needed for post-baby sex slump!!!(men and women)?
my suggestion is to take yourself to your nearest adult novelty store and take care of that 'need' yourself.
sex after the birth of his first child may be difficult. He will come around. Talk with him about other ways you can satisfy each other without intercourse. Toys, oral sex.
I'd say, take care of yourself, and take the time re-connecting with him. There are things about marriage that are more gratifying than sex (believe it or not). If it doesn't get better in a few months, you might want to suggest seeing a counselor.
Did he watch the birth?
It is a temporary thing for the man. I remember going through it. When it is over it will be even better. It might not be as often but I gurantee it will be more explosive.
This is so normal. Right now ur mommy not wife but give him time and he'll soon be back to normal. Guys are sometimes afraid they might hurt us or they look at us differently after birth but no worries, once you feel 100% im sure he will to.
I would ask him what he is feeling...If you had a vaginal birth maybe he is afraid of hurting you, or maybe he is just scared. If you had a c-section, maybe he is afraid your stiches will hurt or that you won't enjoy it. Maybe it's the new fatherhood issue. Usually there are multiple reasons why a man changes after the birth of his first child. I can tell you from both points of view (I had both csection and vaginal birth) and sometimes being a new parent changes who you are and your spouse.
This is normal, I would give him time. you shouldn't be having sex too soon after baby anyhow or you could get pregnant again.
I have a ten month old - i can count the number of times I have had sex on 1 hand....when do you get the opportunity? My DH started acting strange - extremely moody and somewhat of a a$$hole after baby was born as well.....don't know what is up with that....maybe it is b/c he saw the birth like a previous poster said.....much more than I saw. Guess it was pretty gross. never really thought about that factor
Just give him time.........take care of your own needs for awhile......
You 2 need to talk honey.
If he watched the birth, maybe something grossed him out about it.
There could also be the fear that he may reproduce again, and it scares him that he already has one baby he's not sure he can care for.
It's just not the new mothers who suffer, it's the new daddies too.
TALK%26lt; TALK TALK!!
I have the opposite problem. Me and my wife just had our baby 1 year ago and she can have sex but is not interested. And when she is interested its not for her enjoyment anymore its just for mine.
I am feeling less and less sexually attracted to her because of the rejection. I love her very much but we are not being intimate and its driving me nuts. I love sex!! id have it EVERY DAY if i could and I don't care what she looks like i just want to feel intimacy with her again.
I feel like shes had her baby and now shes done with me.. I know that's not the case but i can't help feeling that way.
Me and my husband went through this and when we really got down to the problem, it was that he was stressed about having a new baby and all the responsibility. Your husband may just need a little time to realize that you and him don't have to just be mommy and daddy. It took us a little over 3 months to get back into the groove and what it took was us going out on a few dates without our son and his seeing that there was still an ';us'; and that we could be intimate without it being weird and that we could have time for intimate things without worrying about our son or responsibilities. I suggest doing this - to anyone that recently had a child - go out on a date. Ask a relative (if possible) to watch the baby for an hour or two and you and your husband/wife go out and do something you did while you were pregnant or before you got pregnant. The flame will come back.
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