Another problem I have is that she has always been one of those girls who hang out with guys (one of the guys, as she says). And a lot of these guys she has hung out with in the past, WITH SEX INVOLVED, are now just really good friends of hers. Therefore, she wants to still hang out with them on a casual level. However, every time she hangs out with them, I get upset! Presumably, just as every other boyfriend would! Here is the kicker though, if I even conceive of doing the things she does, or allowing other girls to do what guys do to her, I get a load of crap and she gets really pissed off at me.
On many accounts, I have tried to express my feelings in a rational manor in order to get her to understand where I’m coming from. But she is so freaking hard headed and it is so easy to get her into her defensive mode. I have no idea what to do!!I need some advice from WOMEN...?
Learn to live with it or ditch her because it'll never stop...she thrives on it.I need some advice from WOMEN...?
write a letter... this may sound silly. compare everything she does that you would not normally do because it would hurt her feelings, she wants attention,, but having no close friends could be problem, just keeping telling hey its not ok to do that if your with me. those people had a chance to be with her and obviously didn't work. Can you really continue to have a relationship like that....
Repeat yourself until she gets the hint
Well my advice sadly enuff to say, if you don't really trust her from her past situation I'd NOT MOVE IN WITH HER.. Save yourself the hurt and pain and just see what happens.. if you think moving in together will make things ok and she'd be only faithful to you then your mistaken...
best of luck
well for one thing, the ';naive'; part is totally not true. As a great quote I founds says, ';You cannot kiss a girl unexpectedly. Only sooner then she thought you would.'; sorry don't remember who said it. I'm a chick so I know
dump her...when i was reading the first part of this letter, i thought...okay....she's just hanging out...but then after i was done with it, i realized she's a CRAP! she'll do whatever she wants and restrain u frm doing them??? wake up!!!
She's playing with you. I would seriously give second thoughts to moving in together. It sounds like she has a long way to go in being mature enough for that kind of commitment.
I think you need to be cool off or separated just a week. If she doesn't change i think you need to break her. Because there are many girlsaround you.
She apparently likes to flirt and doesn't care whether it hurts you or not. Unless you want to put up with this the rest of your life I would say let her go. She will probably never change!
Betty M and Renae Z.stop marketing those gd for nothimg blogs of yours at every Q asked on yahoo
hey man dont do this just give it your best shot and you may think that im stupid but i only did not read the description im to lazy
try to talk it out with her i always hang out with the guys and in about grade 7 they tried o get frisky i just laughed and said thats all your ever gunna get it's just like a whatever motion
i wouldn't put up with it..n i dont think you should either..why would you move move with her wen you'r not sure?? think about it.
Let her meet her ';guys'; but when she is with them ust tell her you are going to be with your female friendS (Casually ) and let her understand how you feel
But seriously I think you should talk very seriously about anything that bothers you and probably do all these thing toether
take her to hung out with your friends, go with her and her friends.... try to understand her and her to understand you
hope it helped
break up with her give her a day
and talk to her the next day and she her reaction
it sounds sooooo messed up but my bf did that with me and a day later i got him to realize we should stay together and now we have the best gf [this was just a day ago]
while it hurt had he not done that we wouldnt have a better relationship
been dating for a year and we are 19
Women do this because they CAN. Serious. I am one. Dating ';the pretty girl'; doesn't always pay off. Sure you get attention because she's hot or whatever, but don't forget, if YOU think she's hot, keep in mind that others will too. She's got it and she flaunts it and its starting to get to you.
I know you've tried but you need to tell her it upsets you, that she can have friends, but that if she really wants you and loves you, that she will respect you and won't flirt with others. Tell her the definition of flirting, be really explicit about the particular behaviour that really gets to you.
My current boyfriend used to do it and I didn't say anything and it got to the point where I really had to spell it out. I told him that he had had years to play around, but if he was going to be serious about our relationship, he would have to try harder, lest I leave him and then he could flirt all he wanted. It worked and now we're happy.
I hope this helps.
Ryan,
I moved 5 months ago across country for the love of my life, 2,800miles. Since then I have realized a lot of things about relationships, both mine and friend/family ones. That if you have any such problems, repeatedly, that you are feeling uneasy, I mean to the point that you felt you should ask for help on here...SHE IS NOT THE GIRL FOR YOU. Without question, there is no reason that you should not be able to talk to her, and not only listen to each others side, but apply it and solve the problem.
Ever hear the old saying ';When you know, you know'; ? I found this all my life to be what adults told their children, something that over time they had acquired, something to reassure themselves of the relationship choices they had made. To be honest, in most cases it probably still is. But also I can tell you that from the bottom of my heart, I have found the words to escape me without thought, ';when you know, you really DO know';
I wish you all the best of luck and hope that you make the best choice for YOURSELF, because in the end that is all you have to depend on, yourself.
one of my friends is EXACTLY the same way, and it drives her boyfriend and all of my other friends and i insane. the only thing we can think of is that she's just a natural flirt. that she likes to know that she COULD get other guys and likes the feeling that all eyes are on her and that they want her. its really annoying as a woman, too. i dont really know what ';advice'; to give to you because you have already talked to her about it which is really the only thing you can do.
yow! that sucks! she is a hippocrite and not as naive as you may think. she likes being the center of attention and when guys show interest in her. i believe she also knows when they have alterior motives. if this is seriously bothering you now and she refuses to even acknowledge your concerns it is only going to get worse when you move in together. i hate to say this, but i would rethink whether moving in is such a good idea. in my experience most guys who are players are always players. they do not change and being female is no different. i know my answer sounds mean but this is what i truly believe based on what you wrote. you seem like a nice guy and i think your relationship can be considered a little abusive. i hope i am wrong and that you can work things out but please know the longer you wait to break things off the harder it will be. good luck.
Coming from a girl that has played that card b4 (a long time ago though, I've grown up now) she probably loves the attention and knows that the boys intend to be more than friends. She is getting defensive because she knows you're right! Trust me I've been there. She has some serious self- confidence issues and needs to be sought after constantly to feel like she worth anything. Unless she finds some sense of self worth, more than a flirtatious remark from 'Joe Somebody,' she will never be able to be satisfied with just you pining for her love.
A relationship has to be equal.I would never hang out with a bunch of guys with out my husband first of all.I show him nothing but respect.It seems she isn't doing the same.I'm not saying she's cheating but it's still not fair to you.Like you said,she would flip if you were doing the same.I would rethink moving in with her for a short while.Let her know if this relationship is going to work then it needs to be equal.Hanging with ';friends'; that used to be lovers just isn't cool at all.Just b/c she's real hot doesn't give her the right to act a fool and disrespect you.Good luck buddy and God bless.
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